Brand New Year

Ok the panic and anxiety are really setting in. Oh, and the excitement. But really....I don't have a truck, a place to keep the goats or the goats themselves yet. Although I did start talking to someone referred to me by Tammy...hopefully she'll stay in touch cuz Whidbey Island wouldn't be a bad gig. I keep wondering if I am making bad decisions, like the "rack" for the truck. It occurs to me that I will need to put something in to hold the goats back while I lower the ramp because otherwise they will probably start coming down before the ramp is down and that could be a major problem. Getting the rack on the truck is gonna be a feat as well. How strong am I again? I worry about not being on location with my goats. I don't have a vet kit or a vet yet. Or insurance. Now I start the hyperventilating. Paper bag - stat! My card design isn't done and I need someone to do my website after all. I could be doing marketing if I only had the means!!! At this late date it will probably mean paying more money than I want to as well. Aaaargh! I get to feeling like I don't know WTF I am doing. I live in the city for crying out loud! I can't even get through a 5k without getting overheated and wreaking my body - do I really have the stamina for this? I am used to sitting at a desk staring a computer talking to people not using power tools and figuring out livestock management. I am fearful of goats dying because I don't know what I am doing. And yet I still want to take home half the goats at New Moon Farm right now. I guess being scared is part of the deal with doing something new. I just wish that I didn't feel paralyzed at times. Like the whole month of December. But it is all getting real - my hours are officially reduced mid-month and I will have to rein in my spending habits. As my brother said tonight...how bad of a mistake could I really make on a truck? The training can't come soon enough. I really should be making a list of questions but sometimes it seems like my questions are about having someone else do it for me which is not really the point here. I think it will be a good year it's just getting over the hump of actually starting this venture. I really do have faith that once I get going I will be good and business will be good. Procrastination is not my friend though I keep inviting it in.