So I have made my first official crappy decision in this venture. I was desperate to get these 2 young goats that I fell in love with and I went with a location option that was far less than ideal and when it came to delivering said goats - it didn't pass muster. Too wet, crazy woman in charge, shelter not sufficient etc. I was wet and cold and had been working on this "move-in ready" space all day, I was devastated. The other 4 came from another source who was more flexible in looking at the space especially since it would be temporary. A week later and the goats I tried for have been adopted elsewhere, to a family that has their buddy so it's all good in the long run. And, as important, with the help once again of Tammy, my 4 goats are out on Vashon Island with her smaller crew of animals. The woman really was crazy and trying to get me to pay more money than the space was worth and couldn't even handle a conversation with me about it. So Saturday I met up with Tammy and we loaded George, HoneyBear, Griffin and Stanley into her truck and I drove behind them down the highway all teary eyed cuz it's too hard to see them everyday now but they will be taken care of for less $$ than creepy lady. sigh. So now I am in trying to find a real space where I can adopt from the Rescue and get my 4 a safe place to be closer to me.
So much has gone on since the beginning of the year. I bought a truck. I have business cards. The website should be up within the week and I am trying to get on-site estimates done on the referrals Tammy has sent me. Fencing has been delivered and I am now on the hunt for my power-tools and miscellaneous other needed objects for the biz. I am getting my books set-up. I have trimmed some hooves without the benefit of a stancion and given immunizations. Oh...I was getting up and driving 30 min to my goats in the pre-dawn hours every day for a week and then doing it again in the late evening. I want them closer to me. I want to hang with the goats. George is an attention hog. HoneyBear is kind of a bully. Griffin and Stanley had been working up their courage in dealing with HB and now Griff is gonna be hanging with a couple of siblings over on Vashon. I often feel like I am not doing enough and that maybe I am in over my head. I think that's just fear of the unknown but it causes anxiety nonetheless. Tammy's partner is a psychic and at Tammy's birthday party told me that she could tell I was on the right path. I come back to that often because I really do feel that deep down.
I did decide that regardless of whatever happens with the business end, I need goats in my life and need to live in a place I can have them. These are amazing creatures with ancient histories and interesting mythologies associated with them. I like the smell of hay, and goats and doing something physical, being outside. I was looking in my notebook tonight and found the date that this all started...May 14th, 2010. I am looking forward to the day when I can have my own house with a barn out back with my goats. Have people over, room for guests and shenanigans. Maybe even have room to work on my quilts and make jam/apple butter. I want to be able to teach Josh & Riley not only how to drive a manual car but also to trim goat hooves. Even wrangling a goat for hoof-trimming is satisfying in a strange way. It's a task that gets completed and you can see the progress right then. Not like behavior change in people - that's so far-reaching. System change even more so. I am reading a book calles Goat Song right now and it's fascinating how all this caprine history and lore gets interwoven with the author's experiences with living in the country and having goats and making cheese.
Change is hard and this is a big change as I have to retain parts of my current life while doing this new one. A tricky balancing act and well, my balance hasn't always been that good. I truly am looking forward to getting into a rhythm and then using the animal connection in ways to help serve my favorite populations of disenfranchised folks.
